Thursday, February 2, 2012

The Day I Almost Died

Last January 17, Poppa suffered a heart attack.



It was his birthday.



While driving Momma and my youngest brother to the bus stop around 5 am, Poppa experienced chest pains.



Since he experienced the same thing a couple of nights before that, he paid no attention, with the knowledge that it will go away after a few minutes.

On his way home, while taking a bath and dressing up, the pain was still there.

Past 6am, I woke up to greet Poppa happy birthday when I saw him sitting on the bed with pilows beside him.
I have never seen him so... awkward.
Then he told me he was having chest pains.



I got scared fast.



No one else was around but my aunt and cousin who knew less about these sort of things than me.

I told Poppa we should get to the hospital, but he said no, for very stupid reasons:
No one can drive (our barangay captain and his tanods are just a few houses away and they can drive for us!)
It was hard to get a cab (THERE IS A TAXI TERMINAL TWO STREETS AWAY FROM OUR HOUSE!!)



I wanted to scream at Poppa and tell him to start listening to me or he'll die!!!

But I was scared that things will get worse so I followed everything he wanted me to do, including:

Getting him a glass of cold water



Giving him a barf bucket



Moving around his pillows



Fixing his shirt



Getting his wallet...



Basically anything but going to the hospital.



It was already 6:45am, and the pain hasn't even subsided.
I told him: Poppa, if at 7am the pain hasn't subsided, we have to go to the hospital.

He didn't say yes, but he told me to get dressed so that when he FINALLY realized that he needed to go to the hospital, I am ready.



7am went and past and we were still in the bedroom.
He would lie down, sit up, ask for pillows on his back...
And I was silently crying, tears rolling down my cheeks without stopping.
Thinking about it now, I'd say we look like one of the cheesy telenovelas our country has.

Sorry, I prefer Judy Ann and Gladys.

I saw poppa's face, there was a single tear running down his cheek, and he swiped it off like it was just sweat.



I was literally dying when I saw him in that condition.



Around 7:30 am, our foreman and a couple of construction workers came to do touch ups on our house.
Poppa told me to get the foreman.

...

And he asked him to put oil and make HILOT!!! (hilot is an ancient Filipino remedy wherein elderly shamans rub oil and "massage" the hurt part of the body to rid of "evil spirits")



I wanted to smash my head open on the wall.



Now is not the time for medieval solutions!!!
Poppa needs medical attention NOW!!!

After a few more minutes, Poppa himself asked one of the workers to hail a taxi.
FINALLY.

It was 8am, rush hour.
The cab driver was an a$$h0le, taking his time so that the meter will be higher when we get off.
I wanted to strangle him, but then no one would drive the cab.



I just gave my attention to Poppa, who's chest pains became more intense due to his stress towards the driver.

8:30 am. We reached FEU Hospital here in Fairview. Once papa was on the wheelchair and on the stretcher in the Emergency Room, I cried.

I cried so hard, that the resident doctors thought I was the one in need of medical attention.

They did several tests, and concluded that what my father suffered was a heart attack.

That was the time Poppa told me to tell Momma.
When I called her, she was already on her way because she called home and my cousin told her what happened.

I was starting to feel okay, knowing that Momma knows and that Poppa is already receiving medical attention.

But when I saw Momma coming in, smiling at Poppa and giving him a kiss, asking how he was feeling...

Aren't they the sweetest???


Yup, I cried again.



He was put in the ICU-CCU for two days.

I had to go to class the same day I rushed him to the hospital for a report.
While is giving my report, I was all over place, knowing that I will miss visiting hours because of this.

I saw Poppa on the morning of January 18, because he was up for a 2D Echo (a lab test that checks the heart)
When I saw him come out of the CCU, I had to hold back tears again as he waved to me.



I knew he was feeling better, and I knew he wanted to get out of the hospital as soon as possible.
After all, we were to have our first party as a family on Saturday.

Thursday came and he was moved to a regular room.
Friday came and he was discharged, and we went home...
Happy and grateful that God has given my father another chance.



Little did I know that staying at home would be the hardest part.
Poppa was in denial, and wanted to do everything that he wasn't supposed to do.

I would fight him back, and screaming would ensue.



The truth is, I am just so scared for Poppa.
I don't want anything to happen to him... He doesn't deserve it.
After all the things that he gave and did for his family,
He only deserves a fruitful and healthy life.



But then I am only his daughter.
I still have to follow my father, sick or not.
I realized too, that he will stop when he needs to.



So there I was, silently suffering because of this fear in my heart.

...

Things are getting better, and I am very happy.
Poppa quit smoking, and let go of other unnecessary tasks.

Why did I almost die that day?

Because the moment I saw my father sitting on the bed with that look on his face,
I wished for God to take me instead of him.



This man, who only showed love and care to his family may die any moment.
His love was enough to keep our family together,



And with him gone, all will be lost as well.
I was ready to give my heart, because I know that it will not be wasted.

Thank you God for not listening to my dramatic prayer.
Thank you for giving Poppa back, and for making him realize that SMOKING KILLS.
Thank you to our relatives, who showed so much support, not only for Poppa, but for Momma as well.
Thank you to our cousins, who never fail to make me laugh even in the most dire situations.

And to JETHRO and EJ, who are always there for me no matter what.

..

So now you know why I wasn't able to blog for a while last month.
I know it's a bit sad, but please do cheer up!
Poppa is doing a lot better now, and ALL OF US are on our way to a healthier lifestyle. :)

If my father's friends get to see this, please don't tell him.
He's not fond of public displays of attention..
But I know that Poppa knows this:

I LOVE YOU PAPA!!! :)



This "LOVE" month (although I think every month should be a month of love),
I will post only about the things and people I love.

Comments? Suggestions? Violent reactions? Please post on the comments below!
Follow me on twitter @maccerpacker for more cray cray!

Stay tuned for more! Thank you so much for reading my blog!

Your ilusyonada,
Maccer

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